Tadah!! This is where my group study at night. See the boxes behind Firwan? There are a lot more of them behind Syafiqah and Soraya actually. We don't mind it. We liked it there, although the room could be called storage room.
My group is so much fun! I used to live in hostel for secondary school, so I know how to judge people from my point of view, why? You might say that it's too early for me to judge them,well, you could say that I'm naive, but I did have problems with my friends from previous school so I know how it felt.
Not INTERSABER, but SAMTTAR. From F1 till F3 I studied at SAMTTAR.
Of course, this place is my sanctuary in my early days as teenager, learning how to interact with seniors, friends, juniors, but they just don't understand me, trying to change me, when I'm not like that. I'm not like that, change myself just to get in the group. That's no fun.
Well, I actually don't remember the details though. I don't want to remember it maybe, but what I remember is I cried a lot, thinking what's wrong with my attitude all this time. I can't accept it cause all my friends, already kind of tired of me, and told me about my faults.
I was brokenheart. Really, that time I felt like I was betrayed by them. I couldn't really call them my friends anymore at some point. Then, I was solo ranger at the time. After that, I joined the other group, well how could I face them and saying that I'm alright?
I cried, even tried to consult with my mom, but I couldn't. The minute I tried to tell her about it, my eyes gushing with tears. Even my brother is involved is this matter which is quite embarassing.
In the end, I move away to another school. Making new friends, while bearing in my mind not to make the same mistakes ever again, not to repeat the agony of betrayal again cause I'm not that strong at heart when it comes to relationships. I tried to become a cheerful person, when that's all I could do. How it is I wonder people could find their soulmate?
All the anxiety, insecurities, not knowing what to do, what must to do, in a relationship, what must I do so that I won't have to feel that wound again?
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